My friend over at Servant, Wife, Mother posed a very prayer-provoking question for Mr. Monday...How can we stop squelching, and start nurturing?
If you haven't read her post, I encourage you to click the link above (the name of blog) or her blog button on the right. Be warned, it might make you say "ouch" before you go to God to ask for guidance to help encourage your mister and not squelch his natural tendencies.
As for our house...wow, I cannot tell you how much has changed, some for the good and some for the necessary or even not-so-good. While Darling Groom and I have always tried to encourage each other in pursuits and our tastes, we sometimes fall short. It is something we do continue to strive to accommodate and help each other with. Thankfully, he's very patient with me, lol.
Some of the good things that have been changed since we've been married is how much my husband has grown. Darling Groom was already quite a man when we married, but I've been so blessed to watch him flourish. He's become a third-degree black belt (working on fourth), graduated college, received promotions at work, has learned that he loves to teach, learned how to handle some minor plumbing issues, and so much more. I think one of the biggest and best changes in his life is that he has come to know God in a more personal way and it shows in his behavior and his lifestyle. He has really matured in his walk with God and he has taken it to heart to lead our family in a more dedicated way. That has been the biggest blessing our family could receive.
Can you tell I'm putting off the bad? It's hard to think that I've squelched some things in him or his lifestyle, but I know I have.
Heather mentioned her husband liked Coca Cola themed items and now they have been replaced by sturdier dishes that can handle the hands of a child. I know Darling Groom has endured a similar fate. He doesn't necessarily care about themed dishes, but when he was a bachelor, his eating habits and lifestyle were simple, neat and organized. Now, it's pretty wild and while it adds variety and color to his life I think that sometimes he does miss the singular simplicity in that. I have been working hard to re-simplify our life and I think that he appreciates that. He's patient in that it takes a bit.
Darling Groom is a fitness fiend and some of his workouts have been put off because dinner wasn't scheduled to accommodate or to help one of the children with a history question. He never complains, just puts off his own needs to help us out. He's given up some activities to spend more time with us. He says it's his knees or some other excuse to help us and I do appreciate him being home more, but I wonder if he's doing it for us or him.
There is so much more to our lifestyle that has changed and I will be praying to God to show me areas that don't have to be squelched for him, but rather that we can come together and work out a solution that will blend our tastes and schedules to more better "become one".
Again, if you haven't read Heather's post, I encourage you to head on over there now and take a peek. Then really ask God to help you find ways to show your husband that his desires, though maybe squelched, do matter to you and make an effort to do something about at least one of those things. :) I know that's what I'll be doing!
From the Vineyards of Shiloh
3 months ago
This is such an important topic! I love your response. I've been pondering on it a lot, and it just amazes me.
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